If you don't know me IRL or aren't friends with me on Facebook, then you probably haven't yet heard the news....
I am a published author!
You can follow my Facebook page here.
You can find/follow my website here, where you will also find links to my Author's blog. There you can follow everything going on in my Leigh Michaels world, which you probably will not see much of here on The Shan Clan blog :-).
OH yeah, and you can find my book for purchase here. Currently the paperback version is unavailable on Amazon, but should be available again in a couple of days. (ETA: The paperback version is back in the Amazon store - that was fast!) You can also purchase the paperback version here.
In a few months, the book will also be available in the Nook, Kobo, and iBooks digital stores.
I hope you all will at least come follow my Facebook page and Author's blog! I am in the process of working on books 2 and 3 - so keeping very busy with all the writing, in addition to the parenting and the homeschooling and the court stuff, etc.
Thanks for stopping by!
Thursday, May 15, 2014
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
To My Daughters' Current and Future Role Models
As their mother, I am the most present adult female in my daughters' lives. I strive to have a close and trusting relationship with them as young girls, so that as they get older, they continue to see me as the person they can trust the most and be closest to if they so choose. I therefore also strive to be the very best role model that I can - I dress the same way I allow them to dress (probably more conservatively even); I only use language I would be okay with them repeating; I only listen to music that I wouldn't mind them singing in public; I follow the same house rules that I ask them to follow.
I am BY NO MEANS perfect. I screw up. And when I do, I use the opportunity to teach them about lack of perfection, humility and apologies, and forgiveness.
I have long believed that bringing up girls in this world would be more difficult than bringing up boys. (Notice I didn't say I thought bringing up boys would be easier. Bringing up children is difficult, period.) There is so much more immodesty available to girls. So much more weight to peer pressure, so many more things to apply peer pressure to. And girls can be vicious, especially when other girls don't conform. So I used to worry that my girls would see other girls around the neighborhood, in the grocery store, possibly at public school (though that is not in the foreseeable future), at the park - wherever - and constantly be in a state of "but look what they get to wear" and "but they get to do this" and "but their mom is buying them that." Or whatever.
But now I'm concerned the hardest part about bringing up my girls to be appropriate and modest doesn't lie with the world.
Don't get me wrong. The world is a place with many enticing temptations, and I will never stop praying and protecting my girls from certain aspects of it. But so far, my girls are quick to understand and accept why we dress the way we dress and buy the things we buy and act the way we act. I think that teaching them that through God's salvation and grace, we are to live differently in order to bring glory to Him, is a powerful truth that they can accept and understand.
It's when I go to church and see adult women - particularly those who work with our children and youth - dressed immodestly, that I realize I'm more concerned about poor examples within the church than outside it.
Let me just say, I am NOT a fan of culottes, and I'm not saying women should be required to wear a skirt that covers their ankles. I don't think it's at all difficult to dress nicely, look classy, and be modest at the same time.
I'm all for Christian liberty. I also firmly believe that Christian liberty in private is very different from Christian liberty in public. In private, it's between you and God. In public, you set an example for everyone around you. And sure, you have the liberty to wear whatever you want to church. But if you are a regular presence in the lives of young girls - whether they are 4 or 14 - you should think very carefully about the kind of example you want to set for them, regardless of what you are "at liberty" to wear. And if you are tugging on your skirt every time you sit or stand or move around, it's probably a good indication that the skirt is too short.
Youth group leaders are such a HUGE influence in the lives of our young people, and maybe if they don't have children, they don't even realize it. But both my 14 year old son and my 7 year old daughter are very much in awe of the leaders they spend time with on a weekly basis. And with my daughter already paying close attention to her leaders, I can only imagine how much attention she will be paying them by the time she is youth group age. Not to mention her two younger sisters, as she in turn sets an example for them of what it means to watch and emulate female role models.
If you are a young woman working with young girls, think of the chain reaction you set off every time you spend time with these girls. It can be a positive one, or a less than positive one. You can teach these girls how to be modest, and in turn teach each girl who comes behind her how to be modest. Or you can teach them all otherwise.
I would sooner keep my girls out of a youth group where they have poor role models, than allow them to think that "anything goes as long as you're a Christian."
I am BY NO MEANS perfect. I screw up. And when I do, I use the opportunity to teach them about lack of perfection, humility and apologies, and forgiveness.
I have long believed that bringing up girls in this world would be more difficult than bringing up boys. (Notice I didn't say I thought bringing up boys would be easier. Bringing up children is difficult, period.) There is so much more immodesty available to girls. So much more weight to peer pressure, so many more things to apply peer pressure to. And girls can be vicious, especially when other girls don't conform. So I used to worry that my girls would see other girls around the neighborhood, in the grocery store, possibly at public school (though that is not in the foreseeable future), at the park - wherever - and constantly be in a state of "but look what they get to wear" and "but they get to do this" and "but their mom is buying them that." Or whatever.
But now I'm concerned the hardest part about bringing up my girls to be appropriate and modest doesn't lie with the world.
Don't get me wrong. The world is a place with many enticing temptations, and I will never stop praying and protecting my girls from certain aspects of it. But so far, my girls are quick to understand and accept why we dress the way we dress and buy the things we buy and act the way we act. I think that teaching them that through God's salvation and grace, we are to live differently in order to bring glory to Him, is a powerful truth that they can accept and understand.
It's when I go to church and see adult women - particularly those who work with our children and youth - dressed immodestly, that I realize I'm more concerned about poor examples within the church than outside it.
Let me just say, I am NOT a fan of culottes, and I'm not saying women should be required to wear a skirt that covers their ankles. I don't think it's at all difficult to dress nicely, look classy, and be modest at the same time.
I'm all for Christian liberty. I also firmly believe that Christian liberty in private is very different from Christian liberty in public. In private, it's between you and God. In public, you set an example for everyone around you. And sure, you have the liberty to wear whatever you want to church. But if you are a regular presence in the lives of young girls - whether they are 4 or 14 - you should think very carefully about the kind of example you want to set for them, regardless of what you are "at liberty" to wear. And if you are tugging on your skirt every time you sit or stand or move around, it's probably a good indication that the skirt is too short.
Youth group leaders are such a HUGE influence in the lives of our young people, and maybe if they don't have children, they don't even realize it. But both my 14 year old son and my 7 year old daughter are very much in awe of the leaders they spend time with on a weekly basis. And with my daughter already paying close attention to her leaders, I can only imagine how much attention she will be paying them by the time she is youth group age. Not to mention her two younger sisters, as she in turn sets an example for them of what it means to watch and emulate female role models.
If you are a young woman working with young girls, think of the chain reaction you set off every time you spend time with these girls. It can be a positive one, or a less than positive one. You can teach these girls how to be modest, and in turn teach each girl who comes behind her how to be modest. Or you can teach them all otherwise.
I would sooner keep my girls out of a youth group where they have poor role models, than allow them to think that "anything goes as long as you're a Christian."
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Even When It's True?
"Never say 'never' and 'always.'"
My mom drilled this into our heads from the time we were young. We'd fight, and argue, and inevitably accuse each other of things - whether true or untrue - and nine times out of ten, someone would end up spitting out a phrase containing one - or both - of those words.
"You always take that plate when you know it's my favorite!"
"You never let me pick out the movie we're going to watch!"
"You always pick that movie when you know I hate it!"
"You never let me play video games with you!"
As adults, it's way too easy to let the words creep back into our vocabulary, especially when we're angry or frustrated. The shell words change, but the implications do not.
In parenting...
"You never pick up after yourself."
"Why is it that you never do your chores completely?"
"You always leave your toys out!"
"You always leave your dirty clothes on the bathroom floor."
"You never listen to me!!"
And in marriage...
"You always leave your dirty socks on the floor."
"You never put your dirty dishes in the dishwasher."
"You always turn on the brightest light in the morning, even when I'm still sleeping."
"You never throw your dirty Kleenexes in the garbage."
"You never listen to me!!!"
"You never practice what you preach!"
The reason my mom drilled it into us as kids not to use these words when arguing, is because such absolutes are almost never true - do my kids REALLY leave their toys out every single time they play with them? or does my husband REALLY leave every single pair of dirty socks on the floor?
NOPE.
But what if they really DO do something the same "wrong" way every single time?? I have a memory, as my dad used to say, like a steel trap. It is rare that I forget something (a lot less rare now that I'm a mom! HA!) Let me rephrase - it's not rare that I forget to do something, but it IS rare that I forget details related to any given incident. In other words, if one of my kids truly does forget to put the washcloth in the laundry every single time, I will remember it. And it will not be an exaggeration.
I say this not to brag. It's actually kind of a curse. Here's why.
Even if it's true that my husband or one of my kids always does this or never does that, I should still NEVER use the unacceptable words. And for someone with an excellent memory, who is by nature black-and-white, detailed, straight-forward, and perfectionistic about being accurate, it is VERY HARD for me not to say always and never, when they truly do apply.
Why shouldn't I use them if they are true, you say? My husband NEEDS to know he ALWAYS leaves his wet towel on the floor, you say? My kids NEED to know they NEVER do that chore the right way, you say?
No they don't.
1. Absolutes create defensiveness. Think about it. When someone tells you that you "always" or "never," isn't your first response to deny the accusation?
2. Absolutes create extremes in confidence. In cases such as the examples given above, negative extremes. If someone feels like they never do anything right, eventually they will stop believing they CAN do it right, and they will stop trying.
3. Absolutes leave no room for grace. I can't tell my kids they NEVER do such and such, and follow it with a way to help them change the behavior, and expect them to believe me. I can't teach my children grace or be a helpmate to my husband while sending the message that they don't do anything right. Absolutes and grace mix even less well than oil and water, and mixed messages never achieve positive ends.
Ultimately I want to show God's grace and mercy to my family, more than I want to be "right." And in the end, I can't do that if I use "always" and "never" or any other similar words.
Monday, January 27, 2014
A New Tradition
If you've known me awhile, you know I don't believe in New Year's Resolutions. (I don't think that you should wait until a new year to make a change that needs to be made in your life, and I also think that a change made for a "hype" is less likely to stick. But that's just me.)
However, I do like to use the first month of each year as a time to think about where I need to start fresh, goals I need to set, traditions I would like to begin if I didn't begin them some other time during the year.
One tradition we started a couple of weeks ago actually just happened to occur at this time of year. But I found it an opportune time to start something new and exciting and fun with our three oldest kiddos.
So Sunday nights have turned into "Watch something educational and try something new" night. :-)
(We haven't ruled out the possibility of occasionally mixing it up and just watching something fun, but for now, this is how it goes.)
Our first couple of Sundays, we found documentaries on Netflix, which all three of the kids were actually able to pay attention to without getting too bored. On K3's part, this continues to surprise me a bit, but in a good way.
The first week we watched a documentary about the ocean and ocean life. We tried a couple of new kinds of cheeses, kicking off the new tradition without too much craziness. Limburger was the most exciting thing on our plates LOL.
The second week, we watched a behind-the-scenes documentary about the filming of The Lord of the Rings. In addition to a couple more new kinds of cheese, we tried sardines, liver sausage, and eclairs (none of them new to Randy to me).
Last week, I found the entire Planet Earth (British version) series for a good price on DVD, so last night we started that. The new items on our plates were a couple more new cheeses - brie and herbed goat cheese (being in Wisconsin, this will probably continue to be a theme) - smoked oysters, kumquats, and red bananas, as well as chocolate covered potato chips.
Each week, our main "meal" consists of snacks that everyone already likes, such as summer sausage, cheddar and colby jack cheeses, crackers, popcorn, etc. Everyone is required to try at least one bite of each new item, and then can choose to have more or not.
So far, I think the kids are really enjoying it. I know I am. Coming up with new ideas of things for them to try has become a bit of a game for Randy and me. (We are open to trying new things for ourselves as well - and already have! - but this has proven to be a bit more of a challenge for us.)
I am really loving our new tradition, and looking forward to continuing it throughout the year.
However, I do like to use the first month of each year as a time to think about where I need to start fresh, goals I need to set, traditions I would like to begin if I didn't begin them some other time during the year.
One tradition we started a couple of weeks ago actually just happened to occur at this time of year. But I found it an opportune time to start something new and exciting and fun with our three oldest kiddos.
So Sunday nights have turned into "Watch something educational and try something new" night. :-)
(We haven't ruled out the possibility of occasionally mixing it up and just watching something fun, but for now, this is how it goes.)
Our first couple of Sundays, we found documentaries on Netflix, which all three of the kids were actually able to pay attention to without getting too bored. On K3's part, this continues to surprise me a bit, but in a good way.
The first week we watched a documentary about the ocean and ocean life. We tried a couple of new kinds of cheeses, kicking off the new tradition without too much craziness. Limburger was the most exciting thing on our plates LOL.
The second week, we watched a behind-the-scenes documentary about the filming of The Lord of the Rings. In addition to a couple more new kinds of cheese, we tried sardines, liver sausage, and eclairs (none of them new to Randy to me).
Last week, I found the entire Planet Earth (British version) series for a good price on DVD, so last night we started that. The new items on our plates were a couple more new cheeses - brie and herbed goat cheese (being in Wisconsin, this will probably continue to be a theme) - smoked oysters, kumquats, and red bananas, as well as chocolate covered potato chips.
Each week, our main "meal" consists of snacks that everyone already likes, such as summer sausage, cheddar and colby jack cheeses, crackers, popcorn, etc. Everyone is required to try at least one bite of each new item, and then can choose to have more or not.
So far, I think the kids are really enjoying it. I know I am. Coming up with new ideas of things for them to try has become a bit of a game for Randy and me. (We are open to trying new things for ourselves as well - and already have! - but this has proven to be a bit more of a challenge for us.)
I am really loving our new tradition, and looking forward to continuing it throughout the year.
Monday, January 6, 2014
Updates
Well, I have updates on both K3 and K4's cases. They are long overdue, but I have been frustrated by both situations and daily fighting anxiety over the fates of my girls, and the thought of writing about it has been too overwhelming.
None of that has changed, but as dates are drawing closer, I need to update those who already knew those dates and will soon begin asking about them.
There is a TPR trial scheduled for K3. It was set much later in time than we expected - or than it should have been, based on the court calendar. It could have been scheduled much sooner, but the attorneys know how to play time-dragging games. It's very frustrating. Still, the amount of time between the last hearing and the trial is short compared to the amount of time she has spent in foster care. If you have been in prayer for our little girl and our family, please pray with us that this relatively short amount of time will not, in the judge's determination, outweigh the amount of time she has been in permanency limbo. Please pray that the judge will see that she desperately needs permanence, and that dragging out permanence would be more devastating for her than beneficial.
Secondly, as some of you know, we had an adoption scheduled for K4. We found out right before Christmas that an appeal had been filed on her TPR; the appeal would have been filed in August or early September, yet no one in the DAs office informed anyone in the agency about the appeal. So the adoption will not happen in February, and we will not have a new date until the appeal is dealt with. The date that was supposed to be the adoption will now be a status hearing on the appeal, so again if you are praying with us, please pray that everything will be resolved (or brought near to resolution) at this hearing.
Thanks in advance for your thoughts and prayers. God has really given me peace over these situations, and helps me daily in overcoming the worry and anxiety that come so easily when your child's future is so tangibly unknown. (I know, none of our children's futures are known.) But prayers for continued peace would also be appreciated.
None of that has changed, but as dates are drawing closer, I need to update those who already knew those dates and will soon begin asking about them.
There is a TPR trial scheduled for K3. It was set much later in time than we expected - or than it should have been, based on the court calendar. It could have been scheduled much sooner, but the attorneys know how to play time-dragging games. It's very frustrating. Still, the amount of time between the last hearing and the trial is short compared to the amount of time she has spent in foster care. If you have been in prayer for our little girl and our family, please pray with us that this relatively short amount of time will not, in the judge's determination, outweigh the amount of time she has been in permanency limbo. Please pray that the judge will see that she desperately needs permanence, and that dragging out permanence would be more devastating for her than beneficial.
Secondly, as some of you know, we had an adoption scheduled for K4. We found out right before Christmas that an appeal had been filed on her TPR; the appeal would have been filed in August or early September, yet no one in the DAs office informed anyone in the agency about the appeal. So the adoption will not happen in February, and we will not have a new date until the appeal is dealt with. The date that was supposed to be the adoption will now be a status hearing on the appeal, so again if you are praying with us, please pray that everything will be resolved (or brought near to resolution) at this hearing.
Thanks in advance for your thoughts and prayers. God has really given me peace over these situations, and helps me daily in overcoming the worry and anxiety that come so easily when your child's future is so tangibly unknown. (I know, none of our children's futures are known.) But prayers for continued peace would also be appreciated.
Thursday, November 21, 2013
God's Will and free will
I'm struggling right now to figure out how my faith relates to... things that happen.
I believe this statement: "God has a plan."
I do not believe this statement: "Whatever happens is God's will."
I believe this statement: "I will never leave thee nor forsake thee."
I do not believe this statement: "God will protect you/him/her/them."
And there are two simple words to explain why I believe this: Free. Will.
Don't get me wrong. I believe that God eventually sees His will done for those who truly wish to see His will done, despite the fact that things happen that are OUT of His will. But not everything that happens in the world is His will, and not everything that happens in our lives is His will.
And I believe that God is always with His children, but that doesn't mean He prevents anything "bad" or negative from happening to them.
Because He created man with a free will. So even IF we as Christians were perfect (really, we're not!), we are still surrounded by people who are not Christians. So even though we as Christians (I hope) truly desire to see God's will done and His children protected, we are still surrounded by people who, not knowing Him, have no such desire.
Humans, Christian or not, are selfish and self-centered. We want what WE want, and our choices and actions, more often than not, reflect that.
And because none of us is an island nor lives in a bubble, our actions affect those around us. And since God created man with a free will, He does not put up His big hand and "block" the decisions that we as selfish, self-centered humans make; and as a result, a LOT of things happen that aren't in God's perfect will.
Therefore, the more of these kinds of people you are surrounded by - whether by choice or not - the more likely you are to have things happen in your life that are not God's will, and that you ultimately have absolutely no control over.
So somehow, you - and by "you" I mean "I" - have to figure out how to trust God when you know that there is a very strong possibility that His will may not be done.
And then there's prayer. Do you pray that His will WILL be done? Does praying for His will change things? Make a difference? Somehow prevent those who would seek after selfishness regardless of the people it hurts, from actually making those decisions with such vast-reaching harmfulness?
I don't know. I don't have answers.
I do have God, and I have prayers for trust and peace, and I have a strong faith in Him that I need to hold on to, even - no especially - when it seems like the hardest thing to do.
I believe this statement: "God has a plan."
I do not believe this statement: "Whatever happens is God's will."
I believe this statement: "I will never leave thee nor forsake thee."
I do not believe this statement: "God will protect you/him/her/them."
And there are two simple words to explain why I believe this: Free. Will.
Don't get me wrong. I believe that God eventually sees His will done for those who truly wish to see His will done, despite the fact that things happen that are OUT of His will. But not everything that happens in the world is His will, and not everything that happens in our lives is His will.
And I believe that God is always with His children, but that doesn't mean He prevents anything "bad" or negative from happening to them.
Because He created man with a free will. So even IF we as Christians were perfect (really, we're not!), we are still surrounded by people who are not Christians. So even though we as Christians (I hope) truly desire to see God's will done and His children protected, we are still surrounded by people who, not knowing Him, have no such desire.
Humans, Christian or not, are selfish and self-centered. We want what WE want, and our choices and actions, more often than not, reflect that.
And because none of us is an island nor lives in a bubble, our actions affect those around us. And since God created man with a free will, He does not put up His big hand and "block" the decisions that we as selfish, self-centered humans make; and as a result, a LOT of things happen that aren't in God's perfect will.
Therefore, the more of these kinds of people you are surrounded by - whether by choice or not - the more likely you are to have things happen in your life that are not God's will, and that you ultimately have absolutely no control over.
So somehow, you - and by "you" I mean "I" - have to figure out how to trust God when you know that there is a very strong possibility that His will may not be done.
And then there's prayer. Do you pray that His will WILL be done? Does praying for His will change things? Make a difference? Somehow prevent those who would seek after selfishness regardless of the people it hurts, from actually making those decisions with such vast-reaching harmfulness?
I don't know. I don't have answers.
I do have God, and I have prayers for trust and peace, and I have a strong faith in Him that I need to hold on to, even - no especially - when it seems like the hardest thing to do.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Stuff and Things
SO much has happened since my last post. (I know, I know - you're tired of hearing that EVERY time I write.)
We had an AWESOME start to the school year. We have, for the most part, stuck with a good routine and daily schedule, switching it up here and there when necessary. These last week and a half have been a bit too relaxed for my liking, but next week is our Fall 9-week Break, which is sorely needed; and I fully expect us to start strong again after that.
Part of the reason we've had a relaxed couple of weeks is because I made and canned 18 quarts of apple sauce and about 2 dozen quarts of apple cider. Then my dad "surprised" me with two HUGE boxes of grapes from his buddy's vineyard; so last week, with the kids' help, I got about half of them done and canned into grape juice. I have 6 dozen quarts so far, which means there are another 6-8 dozen quarts' worth of grapes left to can. Oh, and I'm down to a dozen jars, AFTER buying another 2 dozen last week. So this should be interesting.
K3's TPR was FINALLY filed with the court, and the initial appearance hearing was Monday. It was adjourned. It will likely be adjourned again. If you remember from Liam's case, this is the norm. But I'm more frustrated about this case than I was with his, because she shouldn't even have to be worrying about permanence. This should have been over and done a long time ago. I continue to pray for a miracle, but it's hard not to be discouraged some days.
Liam turned TWO a couple of weeks ago! It's pretty ridiculous; I still can't really believe he's 2 already. It still seems like it was just yesterday that we brought him home from the hospital. Soon my K4 will also be 2; not sure how I feel about having two 2 year olds!
Speaking of K4, we have, after much discussion and mind-changing and negotiating, come up with her new name. :-D
Friday is November 1st, which means the beginning of National Novel Writing Month. For the past three years, Hunter has joined me in the novel-writing adventure. This year, Kaleigh will also participate! For those who are not familiar with the Young Writer's Program branch of NaNoWriMo, the coolest part about it is that participants choose their own word count. The kids and I discussed and agreed upon their word counts for this year; but I can't tell you what they are juuuuuuust yet. Don't worry; you'll find out soon enough ;-).
Randy and I took the kids out to the county park for their annual "school" pics this past Sunday afternoon. I SO wish I could share them here, but I can't. Well, I can actually share pictures of three of them, but since I can't share them all, I don't really want to share any. It doesn't feel right.
I guess those are the highlights.
The day-to-day feels like a grind many days. Liam and K4 take turns (or sometimes not) being whiny and clingy. K2 and K3 take turns being deliberately disobedient. Hunter can't quite figure out how to get to the maturity level of a 13 year old. But Liam and K4 also take turns wanting kisses and hugs. K2 and K3 are doing amazingly better at getting along with each other than they were several months ago. Hunter is learning, even though slowly, and sometimes I am somewhat taken aback by his thoughtfulness and kind-heartedness. So just as many days are fun and exciting and enjoyable.
Time to go think about dinner for tonight.
We had an AWESOME start to the school year. We have, for the most part, stuck with a good routine and daily schedule, switching it up here and there when necessary. These last week and a half have been a bit too relaxed for my liking, but next week is our Fall 9-week Break, which is sorely needed; and I fully expect us to start strong again after that.
Part of the reason we've had a relaxed couple of weeks is because I made and canned 18 quarts of apple sauce and about 2 dozen quarts of apple cider. Then my dad "surprised" me with two HUGE boxes of grapes from his buddy's vineyard; so last week, with the kids' help, I got about half of them done and canned into grape juice. I have 6 dozen quarts so far, which means there are another 6-8 dozen quarts' worth of grapes left to can. Oh, and I'm down to a dozen jars, AFTER buying another 2 dozen last week. So this should be interesting.
K3's TPR was FINALLY filed with the court, and the initial appearance hearing was Monday. It was adjourned. It will likely be adjourned again. If you remember from Liam's case, this is the norm. But I'm more frustrated about this case than I was with his, because she shouldn't even have to be worrying about permanence. This should have been over and done a long time ago. I continue to pray for a miracle, but it's hard not to be discouraged some days.
Liam turned TWO a couple of weeks ago! It's pretty ridiculous; I still can't really believe he's 2 already. It still seems like it was just yesterday that we brought him home from the hospital. Soon my K4 will also be 2; not sure how I feel about having two 2 year olds!
Speaking of K4, we have, after much discussion and mind-changing and negotiating, come up with her new name. :-D
Friday is November 1st, which means the beginning of National Novel Writing Month. For the past three years, Hunter has joined me in the novel-writing adventure. This year, Kaleigh will also participate! For those who are not familiar with the Young Writer's Program branch of NaNoWriMo, the coolest part about it is that participants choose their own word count. The kids and I discussed and agreed upon their word counts for this year; but I can't tell you what they are juuuuuuust yet. Don't worry; you'll find out soon enough ;-).
Randy and I took the kids out to the county park for their annual "school" pics this past Sunday afternoon. I SO wish I could share them here, but I can't. Well, I can actually share pictures of three of them, but since I can't share them all, I don't really want to share any. It doesn't feel right.
I guess those are the highlights.
The day-to-day feels like a grind many days. Liam and K4 take turns (or sometimes not) being whiny and clingy. K2 and K3 take turns being deliberately disobedient. Hunter can't quite figure out how to get to the maturity level of a 13 year old. But Liam and K4 also take turns wanting kisses and hugs. K2 and K3 are doing amazingly better at getting along with each other than they were several months ago. Hunter is learning, even though slowly, and sometimes I am somewhat taken aback by his thoughtfulness and kind-heartedness. So just as many days are fun and exciting and enjoyable.
Time to go think about dinner for tonight.
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Nothing Exciting...
I wish I had something fun and exciting to post, but I really don't.
Unless you think chasing two sometimes-crabby toddlers around the house/yard/store all day is fun and exciting.
I did make the Pinterest Flubber with the three bigger kids yesterday. They LOVED it.
I've been mentally preparing for the start of the school year, but now it's time to start more than just mental preparation. As we always start on the Tuesday after Labor Day, we have just over two weeks until the first day of school. Each year since moving here, I have been presented with at least one additional challenge: this year brings several. Hunter will be in eighth grade and Kaleigh in second (which I think is the harder of the two for me to wrap my head around!) K3 will be doing more Pre-K work this year; we will have a little more focus than last year, but I still plan to give her more play than anything. Last year, in addition to my three students, I had a (mostly) infant. This year I have two toddlers. It will be an adventure for sure!
I've maintained a pretty decent summer routine, but I'm sure it would bore the reader, so I won't detail it out here. But I think having that daily routine will help the transition back into the school year go a little more smoothly.
I have a few more things to get - I'd like a large bookshelf for the school room, and the kids still need notebooks - and I have a few little school room projects to do. I need to make die cuts for the calendar, hang the white boards, and do a little rearranging to make the area more study-conducive. Other than that, I'm feeling pretty ready.
I didn't get nearly as much done as far as house projects as I wanted to this summer. I'm hoping to cram a lot into these last two weeks, but we'll see.
Happy Sunday!
Unless you think chasing two sometimes-crabby toddlers around the house/yard/store all day is fun and exciting.
I did make the Pinterest Flubber with the three bigger kids yesterday. They LOVED it.
I've been mentally preparing for the start of the school year, but now it's time to start more than just mental preparation. As we always start on the Tuesday after Labor Day, we have just over two weeks until the first day of school. Each year since moving here, I have been presented with at least one additional challenge: this year brings several. Hunter will be in eighth grade and Kaleigh in second (which I think is the harder of the two for me to wrap my head around!) K3 will be doing more Pre-K work this year; we will have a little more focus than last year, but I still plan to give her more play than anything. Last year, in addition to my three students, I had a (mostly) infant. This year I have two toddlers. It will be an adventure for sure!
I've maintained a pretty decent summer routine, but I'm sure it would bore the reader, so I won't detail it out here. But I think having that daily routine will help the transition back into the school year go a little more smoothly.
I have a few more things to get - I'd like a large bookshelf for the school room, and the kids still need notebooks - and I have a few little school room projects to do. I need to make die cuts for the calendar, hang the white boards, and do a little rearranging to make the area more study-conducive. Other than that, I'm feeling pretty ready.
I didn't get nearly as much done as far as house projects as I wanted to this summer. I'm hoping to cram a lot into these last two weeks, but we'll see.
Happy Sunday!
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
and sometimes...
...the wheels of justice turn as they ought to.
Our little K4 was TPR'd yesterday.
There are, as usual, still 30 days to appeal; but they have no legal grounds, so it's not very likely.
It is almost unbelievable, after all we've been through with every other child, to have a case end this quickly. (**Sidenote: Please don't ANYONE use the word "deserve" in a comment; I absolutely despise the word.) It hasn't even really hit me yet. In fact, because this happened so fast, we have to wait longer than we've ever had to to finalize adoption. She has to live with us for 6 months before we can adopt; so an adoption is schedule for..........drum roll please..........February! This means all of our adoptions so far will be in the same month.
If you pray, please pray - or continue to pray - for our K3. The wheels continue to turn very slowly in her case. Please pray that her TPR will be finalized by December, the main reason being that I don't think I can bear for her to have to watch another child adopted before her. She has been with us a year and a half, and she has been in care for 3 years - almost 75% of her life. Of course there are a multitude of other reasons we are praying for her TPR to be finalized by December, but I really really really want to finalize her adoption at the same time as K4.
Her TPR was referred last week (still annoyed about that, since it could have been done in April and filed by the DA in May), so I'm just hoping the ball will get rolling again quickly. Everyone who is involved from a legal standpoint has been involved since the beginning of her first TPR, which is fairly uncommon, but a really good thing in this case. We are praying and hoping that the judge will want to get this going and overwith, knowing how long she has been in limbo.
More to come. Thanks in advance for all the thoughts and prayers!
Our little K4 was TPR'd yesterday.
There are, as usual, still 30 days to appeal; but they have no legal grounds, so it's not very likely.
It is almost unbelievable, after all we've been through with every other child, to have a case end this quickly. (**Sidenote: Please don't ANYONE use the word "deserve" in a comment; I absolutely despise the word.) It hasn't even really hit me yet. In fact, because this happened so fast, we have to wait longer than we've ever had to to finalize adoption. She has to live with us for 6 months before we can adopt; so an adoption is schedule for..........drum roll please..........February! This means all of our adoptions so far will be in the same month.
If you pray, please pray - or continue to pray - for our K3. The wheels continue to turn very slowly in her case. Please pray that her TPR will be finalized by December, the main reason being that I don't think I can bear for her to have to watch another child adopted before her. She has been with us a year and a half, and she has been in care for 3 years - almost 75% of her life. Of course there are a multitude of other reasons we are praying for her TPR to be finalized by December, but I really really really want to finalize her adoption at the same time as K4.
Her TPR was referred last week (still annoyed about that, since it could have been done in April and filed by the DA in May), so I'm just hoping the ball will get rolling again quickly. Everyone who is involved from a legal standpoint has been involved since the beginning of her first TPR, which is fairly uncommon, but a really good thing in this case. We are praying and hoping that the judge will want to get this going and overwith, knowing how long she has been in limbo.
More to come. Thanks in advance for all the thoughts and prayers!
Faith
Faith is what it's all about.
It's not about the outcome.
It's not about whether God "actually" had my family's best interests in mind (He did, btw).
It's about whether I had faith.
Did He take care of me? Did He take care of my family? Did He provide for us?
Of course He did. He promised He would. That was, therefore, a given.
What matters is....
Did I have faith that He would?
It's not about the outcome.
It's not about whether God "actually" had my family's best interests in mind (He did, btw).
It's about whether I had faith.
Did He take care of me? Did He take care of my family? Did He provide for us?
Of course He did. He promised He would. That was, therefore, a given.
What matters is....
Did I have faith that He would?
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
The Wheels of Justice...
...don't always turn slowly.
Because sometimes they don't turn at all. And is it VERY frustrating, to say the least.
If I could tattoo a verse to the inside of my eyelids, so that my human brain would not so stubbornly forget that it is there, it would be II Corinthians 12:9, for a MILLION reasons (not the least of which is the context from which it comes, which is an entirely different blog post altogether!)
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Today was not one of my finer days as a cog in this process. Today was a day I allowed myself to become overwhelmed with frustration over a screaming toddler, a sassy teenager, and a system that at times does the exact opposite of what it claims to do. Today was a day I was more thankful than usual for God's grace, because it was a day I needed it more than any other day.
Too bad I still forgot at times throughout the day to accept it.
At the end of this very long Jonah day, when I keep mentally coming back to chiding myself for not remembering the free gift of grace that was available to me all day long, the only positive thing I can take away with me is that it will still be there tomorrow. I'm so thankful that God doesn't say, "Well, you screwed up. And too bad that was your last chance. Sucks to be you."
Even Paul had to continually ask God for forgiveness - I know because he was human too. And how else would he have finally learned to boast in his weaknesses, plural? That certainly isn't something that we as humans could possibly learn overnight; we HATE our weaknesses and instinctively want to hide them, not boast in them.
So I will ask God for His forgiveness for my failures today, and for forgetting I do not have to let frustration overwhelm me, and I will ask Him to help me remember His grace tomorrow.
Because sometimes they don't turn at all. And is it VERY frustrating, to say the least.
If I could tattoo a verse to the inside of my eyelids, so that my human brain would not so stubbornly forget that it is there, it would be II Corinthians 12:9, for a MILLION reasons (not the least of which is the context from which it comes, which is an entirely different blog post altogether!)
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Today was not one of my finer days as a cog in this process. Today was a day I allowed myself to become overwhelmed with frustration over a screaming toddler, a sassy teenager, and a system that at times does the exact opposite of what it claims to do. Today was a day I was more thankful than usual for God's grace, because it was a day I needed it more than any other day.
Too bad I still forgot at times throughout the day to accept it.
At the end of this very long Jonah day, when I keep mentally coming back to chiding myself for not remembering the free gift of grace that was available to me all day long, the only positive thing I can take away with me is that it will still be there tomorrow. I'm so thankful that God doesn't say, "Well, you screwed up. And too bad that was your last chance. Sucks to be you."
Even Paul had to continually ask God for forgiveness - I know because he was human too. And how else would he have finally learned to boast in his weaknesses, plural? That certainly isn't something that we as humans could possibly learn overnight; we HATE our weaknesses and instinctively want to hide them, not boast in them.
So I will ask God for His forgiveness for my failures today, and for forgetting I do not have to let frustration overwhelm me, and I will ask Him to help me remember His grace tomorrow.
Monday, July 22, 2013
Free Will
Why is it that when things are going really bad, and we are feeling at our worst, and life seems like it just can't get any worse, and we're miserable beyond belief to the point we just want to tear our clothes and put ashes on our heads... Why is that when so many of us say, "I really need to straighten my life out and get right with God." We cry out for Him, beg Him to remove our affliction, promise we will turn 180 degrees and go where He's called us to go.
And then when the particular storm has ended, and the boat seems righted again, we are soooo quick to place the credit anywhere but on Him. "Good thing I learned those relaxation exercises or I'd never have gotten through that." "Glad I worked so hard putting in overtime at work so I could get that extra money to solve that problem." "Thanks God, but I guess I've got this after all, so nevermind." We might as well thumb our nose at Him and say, "HA! Joke's on you if you REALLY thought I was gonna do that!"
I know some people that have made me wonder why God doesn't keep them in distress, keep their lives in a constant state of turmoil (and I guess I don't know for sure that He doesn't, since turmoil in the heart cannot be seen with the eyes).
And then I realized that if He did that, it would be the equivalent of placing a spell on someone to make them love you - if you have to do that, it's not true love, so what's the point? In other words, taking away our free will, which He does not do. And if that's the absolute only way a person is going to walk with God - if he's in turmoil - then what's the point?
When I was a kid, I used to lie in bed at night and beg God to take away my free will. "Please God," I'd pray, "I know You give us a free will, but please take mine away so it's not such a battle to do what's right all the time." I just wanted to be perfect, for Him. And every time I screwed up and did something wrong, I would lie there at night wondering why God let me do that.
It's still a dichotomy to me, this desire to do right battling the sin nature, while also knowing we will not be perfect this side of heaven. I'm thankful Paul wrote of it, if for no other reason than to know I am not the only one to be confused by it. "For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do." (Romans 7:19, KJV) or " For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing." (ESV)
But back to my original musing. If God brings or allows turmoil in your life, and you realize you need to turn your life back over to Him, don't change your tune once the difficulties go away. If you're willing to follow Him when things are rough, why wouldn't you want to follow Him the rest of the time too?
Sunday, July 21, 2013
Waiting
I think when you're a foster parent, you do a whole lot. Some of it is just regular parenting "stuff": you give baths, play on the floor, read stories, teach life skills and lessons, discipline. Some of it exceeds the bounds of parenting birth children. (Some of the "regular" parenting requirements also exceed the usual limits.) The list is exhaustive, and varies greatly from one foster family to another.
But I think one thing all foster parents would agree on is that there is one thing we do more than anything else: waiting.
And that's what we're doing right now. In so many ways.
For starters, we are waiting to see if a letter gets signed by a judge by Tuesday. If it does, then the snag is resolved and our K4, who arrived again on Friday, is here to stay. If it doesn't, she has to return to the previous foster parents on Tuesday and then come back on Tuesday. This constant back and forth has been hard on her and made it very difficult to get her into a routine and help her start to understand the boundaries. So we pray this letter makes it to a judge to be signed by Tuesday, so that this time, the progress she has made will not be undone.
Secondly, we are waiting for K2's new TPR paperwork to be filed. It could have been filed in May based on the legal timeline, but the CW is not on the ball, and doesn't seem to care that this child has been in the system for over 2 years now. I realize CWs are overloaded and extremely busy, but I would think that a child who has spent so much time in limbo and who KNOWS it, would be at the top of the priority list. As of Thursday, the paperwork had not yet been sent to the DA's office, so now two additional months have passed in the life of this little girl who regularly asks me, "Are we gonna adopt me?
Thankfully, we know that everything is in God's hands. It's hard to believe there's Someone who loves my babies more than I do, but there is, and I have to trust that He is going to take care of them, while praying that He sees fit to place them in the earthly care of the family that they truly belong to.
But I think one thing all foster parents would agree on is that there is one thing we do more than anything else: waiting.
And that's what we're doing right now. In so many ways.
For starters, we are waiting to see if a letter gets signed by a judge by Tuesday. If it does, then the snag is resolved and our K4, who arrived again on Friday, is here to stay. If it doesn't, she has to return to the previous foster parents on Tuesday and then come back on Tuesday. This constant back and forth has been hard on her and made it very difficult to get her into a routine and help her start to understand the boundaries. So we pray this letter makes it to a judge to be signed by Tuesday, so that this time, the progress she has made will not be undone.
Secondly, we are waiting for K2's new TPR paperwork to be filed. It could have been filed in May based on the legal timeline, but the CW is not on the ball, and doesn't seem to care that this child has been in the system for over 2 years now. I realize CWs are overloaded and extremely busy, but I would think that a child who has spent so much time in limbo and who KNOWS it, would be at the top of the priority list. As of Thursday, the paperwork had not yet been sent to the DA's office, so now two additional months have passed in the life of this little girl who regularly asks me, "Are we gonna adopt me?
Thankfully, we know that everything is in God's hands. It's hard to believe there's Someone who loves my babies more than I do, but there is, and I have to trust that He is going to take care of them, while praying that He sees fit to place them in the earthly care of the family that they truly belong to.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Snag
We've hit a bit of a setback.
I can't disclose the details, but keep us and the Ladybug in your thoughts and prayers. The most important thing right now is her best interest.
Thanks in advance!
I can't disclose the details, but keep us and the Ladybug in your thoughts and prayers. The most important thing right now is her best interest.
Thanks in advance!
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Little Miss Thang
Well we have just concluded our final "visit" with the Little Miss.
Let's just say there's going to be a very definite transition period.
It's pretty obvious that she's spoiled. She's used to being picked up and carried around. She's used to her demands being met - immediately. She's used to being parked in front of the TV. She's used to getting what she wants when she wants it.
She's used to falling asleep in front of the TV whenever she darn well pleases and then being put to bed.
If you know us even the slightest, you know that none of that flies here!
Right now, she is about the unhappiest child I have ever met, unless she is being directly entertained in the manner in which she has demanded to be entertained. She walks around the house whining and crying and moaning. Attempts to redirect her and engage her in playing with toys are currently unsuccessful, so I've taken to ignoring the mopey-ness for the most part. When she does smile or laugh engage positively in something, I praise her and hug her and try to make sure attention is put on the positive behavior while being withheld from the negative behavior.
I'm pretty sure that her general unhappiness is a combination of not getting what she wants all day long, and feeling uprooted and displaced right now without any way to express those feelings. I can't even imagine what it's like as a toddler to suddenly start spending long periods of time (several days is an eternity when you're tiny!) in a home you've never seen before, with strangers you don't know, and routines you aren't used to. And we have made some alterations for her, such as rocking her to sleep; while at the same time trying to teach some basic behavior modification, such as not allowing her to scream when she doesn't get her way. (And boy does she scream.)
I have to say that although the process is frustrating (and the screaming is grating), I think that progress has been made even over the course of two visits. When she is placed on time out for screaming and told that I will come get her when she is done screaming, she doesn't scream for quite as long as she did a week and a half ago. (Screaming at nap time is another story, however.)
She does sleep through the night, which I have to say is no small mercy, since Liam is still struggling in that area many nights.
We have two nights, and then K4 (don't pretend you're surprised) will be home on Thursday, Lord-willing to stay <3>
Let's just say there's going to be a very definite transition period.
It's pretty obvious that she's spoiled. She's used to being picked up and carried around. She's used to her demands being met - immediately. She's used to being parked in front of the TV. She's used to getting what she wants when she wants it.
She's used to falling asleep in front of the TV whenever she darn well pleases and then being put to bed.
If you know us even the slightest, you know that none of that flies here!
Right now, she is about the unhappiest child I have ever met, unless she is being directly entertained in the manner in which she has demanded to be entertained. She walks around the house whining and crying and moaning. Attempts to redirect her and engage her in playing with toys are currently unsuccessful, so I've taken to ignoring the mopey-ness for the most part. When she does smile or laugh engage positively in something, I praise her and hug her and try to make sure attention is put on the positive behavior while being withheld from the negative behavior.
I'm pretty sure that her general unhappiness is a combination of not getting what she wants all day long, and feeling uprooted and displaced right now without any way to express those feelings. I can't even imagine what it's like as a toddler to suddenly start spending long periods of time (several days is an eternity when you're tiny!) in a home you've never seen before, with strangers you don't know, and routines you aren't used to. And we have made some alterations for her, such as rocking her to sleep; while at the same time trying to teach some basic behavior modification, such as not allowing her to scream when she doesn't get her way. (And boy does she scream.)
I have to say that although the process is frustrating (and the screaming is grating), I think that progress has been made even over the course of two visits. When she is placed on time out for screaming and told that I will come get her when she is done screaming, she doesn't scream for quite as long as she did a week and a half ago. (Screaming at nap time is another story, however.)
She does sleep through the night, which I have to say is no small mercy, since Liam is still struggling in that area many nights.
We have two nights, and then K4 (don't pretend you're surprised) will be home on Thursday, Lord-willing to stay <3>
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Family Vacation 2013 Part 3 - From Maine to Wisconsin!
I'm sitting here feeding Liam his breakfast (he eats almost everything by himself, but oatmeal notsomuch), and decided it's a good time to put out the third and final installment of our family vacation adventures.
We got most of our packing done Thursday evening - it was so nice to put clean, folded clothes into the suitcases instead of trying to separate what was left clean from the mass of dirty laundry! Wednesday morning, we finished up the last few things and headed out, leaving my parents to a day of peace and quiet.
From the moment we hit the east coast and I remember Tim Horton's, I wanted to make sure we stopped there once while we were out there. So Wednesday morning breakfast it was!
The coffee was good but I was disappointed in their selection. (I miss Caribou *sniff sniff*.) The food was pretty good but a tad overpriced for having to feed a family of six. Still, it's something I've wanted to try literally for at least 10 years, so I got that out of my system.
And then we were off to Boston!
We started off by driving all over the city, looking for a specific parking garage near the USS Constitution, because I knew that would be one main thing Randy would want to see while we were there. We finally found the parking garage, after a fascinating driving tour of modern and historical Boston. We spent a good amount of time looking at the Constitution and the other sights in the harbor, including the museum gift shop, where I got each of the kids the Freedom Trail book that lists and discusses all the sights along the Freedom Trail.
Two views of the USS Constitution:
The cityscape from the harbor:
Cannons from WWII:
The kiddos:
Upon leaving the harbor, we decided to take the pedicabs across the bridge. That was quite the experience.
Once we disembarked from the pedicabs, we decided to take the alternate trail, since the main trail was packed with tourists. Some of the highlights were the Old North Church, the Copp's Hill Burial Ground, and a lot of old buildings. We walked what WAS the shoreline in 1775, which is now several main streets and even juts up into the city farther down.
It was very cool for the kids to see some things they have studied this semester in US History, particularly the Revolution, which is what we focused on during the last couple of months of school.
Compared to everything there, I felt like we saw very little, though we were in the city for several hours. It's definitely a trip we will have to take again!
Wednesday night, we stayed in a hotel in Swansea, MA, 20 minutes from the Providence airport. The kids enjoyed having the hotel pool to themselves all evening, and everyone slept well and rose early to head to the airport.
We had an almost 3 hour layover in Cleveland, and once we hit Milwaukee, we had to take a shuttle out to where we had left our car. Then we had a 30 minute drive home. By the time we pulled into our garage, it had been a very long day of travel. I, for one, was very glad to be home in my own bed with my own pillow :-).
We got most of our packing done Thursday evening - it was so nice to put clean, folded clothes into the suitcases instead of trying to separate what was left clean from the mass of dirty laundry! Wednesday morning, we finished up the last few things and headed out, leaving my parents to a day of peace and quiet.
From the moment we hit the east coast and I remember Tim Horton's, I wanted to make sure we stopped there once while we were out there. So Wednesday morning breakfast it was!
The coffee was good but I was disappointed in their selection. (I miss Caribou *sniff sniff*.) The food was pretty good but a tad overpriced for having to feed a family of six. Still, it's something I've wanted to try literally for at least 10 years, so I got that out of my system.
And then we were off to Boston!
We started off by driving all over the city, looking for a specific parking garage near the USS Constitution, because I knew that would be one main thing Randy would want to see while we were there. We finally found the parking garage, after a fascinating driving tour of modern and historical Boston. We spent a good amount of time looking at the Constitution and the other sights in the harbor, including the museum gift shop, where I got each of the kids the Freedom Trail book that lists and discusses all the sights along the Freedom Trail.
Two views of the USS Constitution:
The cityscape from the harbor:
Cannons from WWII:
The kiddos:
Upon leaving the harbor, we decided to take the pedicabs across the bridge. That was quite the experience.
Once we disembarked from the pedicabs, we decided to take the alternate trail, since the main trail was packed with tourists. Some of the highlights were the Old North Church, the Copp's Hill Burial Ground, and a lot of old buildings. We walked what WAS the shoreline in 1775, which is now several main streets and even juts up into the city farther down.
It was very cool for the kids to see some things they have studied this semester in US History, particularly the Revolution, which is what we focused on during the last couple of months of school.
Compared to everything there, I felt like we saw very little, though we were in the city for several hours. It's definitely a trip we will have to take again!
Wednesday night, we stayed in a hotel in Swansea, MA, 20 minutes from the Providence airport. The kids enjoyed having the hotel pool to themselves all evening, and everyone slept well and rose early to head to the airport.
We had an almost 3 hour layover in Cleveland, and once we hit Milwaukee, we had to take a shuttle out to where we had left our car. Then we had a 30 minute drive home. By the time we pulled into our garage, it had been a very long day of travel. I, for one, was very glad to be home in my own bed with my own pillow :-).
Friday, June 21, 2013
A "Little" Surprise
I still have one vacation post to write, but it's time to pause and make a little announcement.
A couple of you already know, and a couple more of you may have guessed. For the rest of you, here it is:
Liam is about to become a twin!
As Paul Harvey would say, here is the rest of the story:
In early April, Randy and I received information from Liam's previous caseworker about a little girl on her caseload who was going to need to be moved soon, as she was about to be referred for TPR and was with a foster family who would not be planning to adopt. I had mentioned to her in the past that I hoped we would be able to add one more child in the future, and she wanted to know if we were still considering that, so she could have us looked into as a potential resource for Baby Girl.
There's a process that has to be followed when looking to place a child in general, and especially when placing a child with an adoptive resource. As we waited (somewhat) patiently for the process to occur, I checked in regularly with the CW to see how things were coming along.
Eventually she was referred. To another family. I never received "official" word that she was being placed with the other family, and I didn't pester the CW for it, because in all honesty, I didn't want the official rejection. I had a nagging feeling in the back of my mind, but I knew that God was watching out for her, and I decided to simply pray for her, her safe-keeping, and her future.
When I didn't hear anything more, I assumed she was being moved to the other foster family. I moved on mentally, simply saying a little prayer for her whenever she came to mind.
Last week, we got a phone call from the CW. Baby Girl's placement fell through. She had a couple of visits with them, and on the visit that was supposed to continue into official placement, they decided they couldn't do it, for personal reasons. CW went to pick her up and asked Placement what she should do; they asked her to see if we were still interested.
So we'll be starting visits with her next weekend. She is two months younger than Liam; so I will have the boy-girl twins I've always wanted :-).
More to come as we continue on this wonderfully crazy journey :-).
A couple of you already know, and a couple more of you may have guessed. For the rest of you, here it is:
Liam is about to become a twin!
As Paul Harvey would say, here is the rest of the story:
In early April, Randy and I received information from Liam's previous caseworker about a little girl on her caseload who was going to need to be moved soon, as she was about to be referred for TPR and was with a foster family who would not be planning to adopt. I had mentioned to her in the past that I hoped we would be able to add one more child in the future, and she wanted to know if we were still considering that, so she could have us looked into as a potential resource for Baby Girl.
There's a process that has to be followed when looking to place a child in general, and especially when placing a child with an adoptive resource. As we waited (somewhat) patiently for the process to occur, I checked in regularly with the CW to see how things were coming along.
Eventually she was referred. To another family. I never received "official" word that she was being placed with the other family, and I didn't pester the CW for it, because in all honesty, I didn't want the official rejection. I had a nagging feeling in the back of my mind, but I knew that God was watching out for her, and I decided to simply pray for her, her safe-keeping, and her future.
When I didn't hear anything more, I assumed she was being moved to the other foster family. I moved on mentally, simply saying a little prayer for her whenever she came to mind.
Last week, we got a phone call from the CW. Baby Girl's placement fell through. She had a couple of visits with them, and on the visit that was supposed to continue into official placement, they decided they couldn't do it, for personal reasons. CW went to pick her up and asked Placement what she should do; they asked her to see if we were still interested.
So we'll be starting visits with her next weekend. She is two months younger than Liam; so I will have the boy-girl twins I've always wanted :-).
More to come as we continue on this wonderfully crazy journey :-).
Family Vacation 2013 Part 2 - Fun Times in Maine!
**Wedding pictures will be coming to FB only.
Once we got through the wedding, we had a family vacation to focus on! I had been doing some research for a couple of months prior to vacation, and came up with several fun activities for us to do while on the trip.
For our Sunday adventure, we headed down to Cape Elizabeth with my parents to visit some lighthouses and a lobster shack. The kids all ate their first lobster!
Here is the first lighthouse we saw. The kids enjoyed skipping rocks into the inlet of the Atlantic Ocean:
Here are the second and third lighthouses we saw, as well as a couple of other interesting items:
I also got some really cute pictures of the girls with my mom, but I don't get to post those here.
Our Maine adventure for Monday was something Randy has been wanting to do for a long time, and was the ONE thing he wanted to make sure we did while in Maine. We went on a whale-watching cruise in the Atlantic.
Here are some pictures from our beautiful two-hour drive up the coast of Maine to Bar Harbor:
Here we are having our snack in the park before getting on the boast for the cruise:
Here are some pictures from the ship we were on for the whale-watching cruise:
Acadia National Park:
The mountains on the coast:
Unfortunately, I don't have any other pictures from the cruise, because Liam and I then got seasick and spent the rest of the trip sleeping (Liam) and trying unsuccessfully not to throw up (me). Before falling asleep, though, Liam threw up all over me and a little bit a second time on Randy. It's going to be a long time (like forever) before he or I go on a boat again.
Randy and the big kids had a blast and ended up seeing 6 or 8 whales, some seals, and some puffins.
By the time we got a couple of things from the gift ship (including a new shirt!), stopped at a McDonalds to clean up a little better and change shirts, got the kids some supper for the car ride back, and settled in for our two-hour return trip, I was just glad the day was over.
My parents had picked up some live lobster while we were gone, and made us a yummy lobster dinner, after Liam and I had a shower and all the kids were in bed, of course.
I was very thankful that we had planned for Tuesday to be a day to relax. Mom and I found a laundromat and did some laundry. On the way back, we picked up Moody's whoopie pies for the kids (little and big). It was just a generally laid-back day.
All in all, our time in Maine was very enjoyable, and no one could deny that it was an adventure!
Once we got through the wedding, we had a family vacation to focus on! I had been doing some research for a couple of months prior to vacation, and came up with several fun activities for us to do while on the trip.
For our Sunday adventure, we headed down to Cape Elizabeth with my parents to visit some lighthouses and a lobster shack. The kids all ate their first lobster!
Here is the first lighthouse we saw. The kids enjoyed skipping rocks into the inlet of the Atlantic Ocean:
Here are the second and third lighthouses we saw, as well as a couple of other interesting items:
I also got some really cute pictures of the girls with my mom, but I don't get to post those here.
Our Maine adventure for Monday was something Randy has been wanting to do for a long time, and was the ONE thing he wanted to make sure we did while in Maine. We went on a whale-watching cruise in the Atlantic.
Here are some pictures from our beautiful two-hour drive up the coast of Maine to Bar Harbor:
Here we are having our snack in the park before getting on the boast for the cruise:
Here are some pictures from the ship we were on for the whale-watching cruise:
Acadia National Park:
The mountains on the coast:
Unfortunately, I don't have any other pictures from the cruise, because Liam and I then got seasick and spent the rest of the trip sleeping (Liam) and trying unsuccessfully not to throw up (me). Before falling asleep, though, Liam threw up all over me and a little bit a second time on Randy. It's going to be a long time (like forever) before he or I go on a boat again.
Randy and the big kids had a blast and ended up seeing 6 or 8 whales, some seals, and some puffins.
By the time we got a couple of things from the gift ship (including a new shirt!), stopped at a McDonalds to clean up a little better and change shirts, got the kids some supper for the car ride back, and settled in for our two-hour return trip, I was just glad the day was over.
My parents had picked up some live lobster while we were gone, and made us a yummy lobster dinner, after Liam and I had a shower and all the kids were in bed, of course.
I was very thankful that we had planned for Tuesday to be a day to relax. Mom and I found a laundromat and did some laundry. On the way back, we picked up Moody's whoopie pies for the kids (little and big). It was just a generally laid-back day.
All in all, our time in Maine was very enjoyable, and no one could deny that it was an adventure!
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